Archive for May, 2013

The Ethicator’s next marketing venture

May 12th, 2013

Devoted followers will know that I’ve been seeking ways to monetize the runaway success of my blog. I’m excited to say that I’ve just caught the eye of a highly coveted Internet marketing firm in the UK. I’ve left out the names, but as you can see, things look very promising.

If you’ve got a product to sell and want in on this action, email me at

Subject: Enquiry regarding
Date: Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:25:32 +0800

Hi Carl,

I work for                   ; a UK based Digital Marketing Consultancy.

We represent clients interested in social media marketing on smaller sites with little or no existing advertising and we’re currently looking for advertising partners.

We pay a fixed upfront annual fee which we will agree on with you. Once the ad is in place, payment is made within approximately 48 hours.

Would you be interested in placing a small text-based ad on

Kind regards,



Date: Thu, 17 Jan 2013 00:08:32 +0000
Subject: Follow Up on Advertising Proposal

Hi Carl,

I’m not sure if you recall, but I recently sent you some details regarding placing a text advert on your site. I was wondering whether you’d given it any thought. You’re probably very busy, but it seemed sensible to send you a quick email.

That said, sometimes emails get flagged as spam, so I’m also making sure I’m not ending up in your junk mail by mistake, as it does sometimes happen! If you’ve any questions, please feel free to let me know, I’m here to help.

Many thanks,


From: White Coat, Black Hat <>

Date: Wed, Jan 16, 2013 at 10:34 PM
Subject: Re: Follow Up on Advertising Proposal


Thank you for your inquiry, but I think you have the wrong person. I am not Carl; I am his brother.  Carl talked me into setting up this website a couple of years ago, but then bailed on me after I wrote a biography he didn’t like and published an interview that made him look like a mendacious, bullying fraud.   Then he went all crybaby on me, and I wound up on my own.  So here I am.

But here’s the good news:  My blog has become a viral sensation, with arguably the highest impact factor of any bioethics blog out there.  I do interviews, I run a regular advice column called the Ethicator, and much more.  I have a large and growing fan base, especially among Carl’s enemies, and I am totally up for getting some advertising revenue coming in (Lord knows I’ll never see any money from Carl).  So let’s talk turkey:  What are you planning on advertising on my site?  I’m thinking I need a diverse ad base – Scientology sites and boner pills alike.  Also some herbal stuff in case that makes me look even-handed.

How much money are we talking about? Do I need provide you with a Paypal account?  I would rather not have my name out there, in case Carl ever decides to sue me.  Would you be comfortable simply sending a cash envelope to a PO Box?  We can discuss further.  I eagerly await your reply.

The Ethicator


Date: Thu, 17 Jan 2013 04:16:07 +0000
Subject: Re: Follow Up on Advertising Proposal

Thanks for getting back to me!

The client we represent would like to expand its brand influence further, and in order to achieve that goal, they need to advertise on sites based inside and outside of the UK. Since the best way to do this is through the internet, we search for websites that match our clients’ requirements then contact the site’s webmaster.

Basically, we wish you to create a new post or article on your blog to accommodate our client’s link.

We will provide you with the URL, and you can link to it in any manner you see fit (topic, content, language, length). You can write the page (preferably 250-words or two paragraphs) in review format or simply write about the usual topics on your site. We would offer you 120 USD.

The fee I sent you are quoted for a year’s placement and we pay the whole amount in US Dollars upfront.

To give you an idea of what a text advert looks like, please view our example at the following link: where the anchor is ‘Virgin Atlantic’.

We aim to complete payment via secure payment partners Paypal or Moneybookers within 1 to 2 days of the advert going live on your site.

Also, you may read our terms and conditions:                             .pdf.

I won’t be able to give you an example as it will violate our Non-Disclosure Agreement with webmasters but I can give you more details regarding the client we have for your website.

Our technical and clients team would have to make a further assessment of your website (in terms of quality, content, design, and etc.,) so that we can check to which client specifications your website matches before we can send you more details. We will make sure that you agree with client before asking you to place our advert live on your site.

Would you be interested in having your website further assessed? If you are, please let me know. We’ll then send over the client’s URL (subject to your approval) so you can proceed with the draft of the advert.

Lastly, if you have more websites we can work on, please feel free to send over a list. It would help if you can include the list of websites on your next email so I can start lining them up for assessment and review.

Looking forward to hearing from you.




From: White Coat, Black Hat <>
Date: Thu, Jan 17, 2013 at 11:53 PM
Subject: Re: Follow Up on Advertising Proposal

This sounds awesome. Do you have any pharmaceutical companies as clients? That would be even better. Now, I’m wondering if you could you explain a few things to me. I’m wondering if you have in mind my writing a full post devoted to your client’s product, or just a casual mention with a link. If it’s the latter, I’m thinking of something like:

  • “If that fucker Carl had ever bothered to pay me for his website, I’d be driving a KIA Sportage right now.”
  • “I spent last night with a bottle of George Dickel and some Ambien, thinking of the ways Carl has wronged me. Yet sleep never came.”
  • “I ordered the venti espresso from Starbucks, crushed up some of my Adderall and had myself a time”

I’m sure those could be worked into just about anything. A full post could be a little more complicated; it depends on who wants the ad space. Right now, I can tell you I have at least one post in the works that would likely interest both the makers of Levitra and Wild Turkey. But stay tuned …

One last question: If Carl sues me for what I say in your ad, who pays? Will your client help, or is that still on me?

I look forward to hearing from you.

The Ethicator


Date: Tue, 22 Jan 2013 01:24:01 +0000
Subject: Re: Follow Up on Advertising Proposal


Sorry for the delayed response.

On this occasion, we could not match your site with a current client. However, we are continuously bringing new clients on board and I expect to have a good match for you in the near future.

With your permission, I’ll keep your site on our list and will get back to you if I find a suitable advertiser.

In the meantime, if you or anyone you know manages other sites that we might consider then please feel free to forward them to me.

Best regards,



Ethicator, Uncategorized