White Coat, Black Hat

The Ethicator – Our First Question

Chuck E Cheese

Our reader asks:

Dear Ethicator,

My drug studies are getting really expensive, mainly because I have to pay the volunteers so much. It would be a lot cheaper to test the drugs on kids. I'm pretty sure I could get them to sign up for studies in exchange for an afternoon at Chuck E. Cheese and a bag of Halloween candy. What do you think? (Also, do do you know if they have portable defibrillators at Chuck E Cheese?)

Just trying to do the right thing,

Jerry M.

The Ethicator replies:

Question: Is this for an erectile dysfunction drug? If so, I think it may be out of line to test it on kids. Otherwise, what's the harm?

Bring a defibrillator just in case. There is such a thing as being too thrifty.

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  1. Awesome idea. One problem, though. In Azerbaijan, where my company does its studies, there is no Chuck E. Cheese. My study coordinator says try lentils, but that doesn’t seem fair when the Americans are getting pizza. Thoughts?

  2. Need pads, batteries and supplies for your AED? We are the world’s largest supplier of Automated External Defibrillators. 30-day money back guarantee.

  3. Dearest Ethicator:

    We @Batterupyoursexlife.com supply sell black market Viagra & other important ethically based product lines @ 1/4 the cost of the real thing; with all the same up standing results….we are looking for someone of your talents that has our similar lack of moral constitution & extremely low ethical obligations to pimp our services to the masses….give us a jingle @ 976-Yea-baby & we can do lunch….


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